Watch Out Jala, Here Comes Drank

A frosty glass of Drank

No sooner did we report that Jala, a carbonated pomegranate drink and, in our opinion, a candidate for Azerbaijan’s new liquid gold, will be sold in stores in the UK, than competition reared its ugly head.

Well, sort of. This time, we bring you news of a beverage being imported into Azerbaijan. And not just any beverage: a carbonated relaxation soft drink that promises – no joke – to “slow your roll” with a mixture of melatonin, valerian root, and rose hips.

Azerbaijan will become the first international market for Drank, a product of the Innovative Beverage Group Holdings Inc., that now sells in the US and Canada. According to an announcement in the Houston Business Journal, the “anti-energy drink” will be available there already in the next few weeks.

Did we miss something important? Are Azeris in particular in need of relaxation?

UPDATE: Apparently, we aren't the first to take note of Drank, a fact you might discover if you search the website of The New Yorker under the key words "Drank," "Purple Drank," "Beverages," "Drinks," "Cough Medicine," "Taste Tests," or "Lil Wayne."

The soft drink, it seems, has its predecessor in a kind of sedative cocktail that combines cough syrup with 7UP, hails from Houston, TX, and has been immortalized by the rapper Lil Wayne in the song "Me and My Drank." The song, according to the magazine's Ben McGrath, includes the lines "One more ounce will make me feel so great / Wait, now I can’t feel my face.”

Which answers one question: who would drink something that tastes like “carbonated grape Kool-Aid with a hint of Dimetapp?” (McGrath confirms that the store-bought version contains nothing stronger than rose hip. He also says the drink was first marketed to nervous Wall Street traders.) But the Azeri mystery remains. Anyone know how Lil Wayne’s doing in Azerbaijan?